Idiocy
by Shinigami's Death Angel
Summary: Only idiots bought into Valentine's Day hype, and Dick couldn't stand those idiots. So then why is Wally standing outside in the snow holding a stuffed robin?


**Idiocy**

High school was awful. Early morning starts in high school were awful. Early morning starts on Fridays in high school were awful. Early morning swim practice before the start of high school on Fridays was awful. Waking up at the crack of dawn on a Friday to negative wind chill weather in order to get to early morning swim practice before the start of high school was awful. The fact that it was Valentine's Day just made it all the more awful.

With still damp hair dripping on the back of his neck, Richard Grayson stood in front of his swim locker with his forehead rested tiredly against the closed door. His teammates around him were busy drying off and chatting amongst themselves, but Dick had his eyes closed to the world as he silently berated his body for waking up that morning.

Dick wasn't a Valentine's Grinch, not really. He didn't scowl at the obnoxiously pink décor that the student government always draped the halls with. He didn't roll his eyes at all of the gooey-eyed couples or the whisperings that made girls giggle like mad. He was never mean to any of the numerous girls who stutteringly handed him Valentine cards every year, although he always politely turned them down and never bought any cards himself. No, Dick didn't hate Valentine's Day, he just didn't understand how it turned so many people into irrationally besotted idiots.

Huffing out a long breath as the locker room emptied around him, Dick finally opened his locker to grab his towel out when he overheard two of his teammates' conversation. They were apparently discussing all the trouble that they had gone through to get reservations for that night at their girlfriends' favorite restaurants.

Shaking his head in bewilderment, Dick wondered if Valentine induced idiocy was contagious. Deciding not to risk it, Dick quickly dried off and changed into his school uniform before slamming his locker shut.

* * *

Twisting his lock's combination wheel, Dick felt a bit of apprehension settle in his gut. It was just after lunch, and as much as Dick would have loved to put off opening Pandora's box until the end of the day he needed to switch out his textbooks. As the lock clicked open, Dick braced himself before opening his locker with no small amount of reluctance.

A showering of red and pink cards fell to the floor at Dick's feet, some of them bouncing off of his face in the process. Once it was certain that the assault was over, blue eyes cracked open from being scrunched closed to assess the damage.

"It's that time of year again, huh?" Adam, whose locker was next to Dick's, gave him a sympathetic smile as he was treated to his own shower of cards.

"Thank god the locker slits aren't big enough for anything heavier than cards or we'd get concussions." Dick managed a forced, joking smile as he stared at the accumulation at his feet. Every year he was showered with hopeful confessions from the girls who were smitten with his smarts, his kindness, his wit, his relation to Bruce Wayne, you name it and Dick's heard or read it on Valentine's Day. Damn him for being so attractive.

"Hang in there, buddy, it'll all get better once we get girlfriends." Adam laughed as he gathered his cards and books before closing his locker, missing the slight grimace his words brought to Dick's face.

With a sigh, Dick knelt down to pick up his own cards, all the while making note of the names on them so that he could thank any of the girls if he saw them during the day. He may not agree with the enthusiasm that they put into the holiday, but he was raised right and always made sure to acknowledge their sentiments. No matter how much it sometimes killed him to do so when they were particularly persistent.

Dick would never understand how so many girls could so blindly fall into the trap set up by card companies to bleed money from fools who bought into the holiday. It's not like people actually saved those seven dollar glittery cards, but who was he to judge.

* * *

Sitting in his last class of the day, Dick found all of his attention fixated on the mounted clock above the chalkboard as he willed time to move faster. Gotham Academy student government, bless their annoyingly peppy souls, had a tradition of delivering flowers on Valentine's Day during last hour as a fundraiser. Being Gotham Academy, the flowers that were delivered weren't normal individual flowers, no, but rather large bouquets that never failed to make the recipient blush as the rest of the class enjoyed their embarrassment.

Thankfully, Dick had never been subjected to flowers from any of his admirers, but he could never be too leery when last hour rolled around.

Right on time at the stroke of three o' clock, fifteen minutes before freedom, there was a knock at the classroom door followed by three laden down student government members. The class's attention immediately left the teacher as giant bundles of roses were handed out to excitedly squealing girls.

With each bouquet delivered, Dick felt his tension ease until, eventually, none were left. It seemed as if he was coming out of another Valentine's Day with some dignity intact. For as much as girls were after him for some superficial reason or another, at least none of them ever tried to send him flowers. Dick was pretty sure that his tolerance for the holiday would permanently snap if that ever happened.

The remainder of the class time was thoroughly wasted as no one was paying attention to the long forgotten teacher, which left Dick to sit at his desk and continue his staring contest with the clock. When the final bell rang, Dick was on his feet and out the door before the excitedly twittering class could even register the end of school.

As Dick walked out of the school building with a heavy, relieved sigh, he reached up to loosen his tie and mess his hair up a little. It had been a long Friday, made even more so by him having to be nice to brainwashed girls all day, and he was just ready to go home and watch TV. Looking up towards the sky as a cold dampness fell on his face, Dick sadly wondered why it had to snow on top of his day from cupid hell.

Pulling coat and scarf tighter around him, Dick was about to duck his head in defeat and head home when a shock of red against the white backdrop caught his attention. Head jerking up, Dick's eyes met shyly smiling green as the bundled up redhead stood in the middle of the courtyard, unmindful of the students streaming around him.

Snow had dusted itself in Wally's bright red hair, Dick noticed as he stepped towards his friend. Dick had to wonder how long Wally had been standing outside for snow to have clung to him that much. Giggling from some of the students around him caused Dick to look down at Wally's arms, which were currently wrapped tightly around a stuffed robin. Which meant, Dick realized, that Wally had also found the card, single red rose, and chocolate kisses that had been stealthily snuck into his locker the night before.

Damn. Dick had been sure that he'd have a little more time before having to explain himself.

Once the two teens stood right in front of each other ankle deep in fresh snow, a comfortable silence enveloped them as all noise was gently muffled by the surrounding white. Green eyes blinked at blue as puffs of breath curled between them, so close together that it was impossible to tell whose breath swirled before them.

"You hate Valentine's Day." Wally's voice was odd as he glanced at his fuzzy armful.

"I don't hate Valentine's Day. I hate how people lose their minds on Valentine's Day." Dick corrected as he dropped his bag into the snow. Wally didn't seem to notice.

"But…then why…" Wally looked from his stuffed robin to Dick and back with a confused expression.

Dick sighed at the redhead's denseness, reached his arms up to wrap around Wally's neck, and stood up on his tip toes to kiss his boyfriend right in the middle of his school's still very busy courtyard. Pulling away, Dick was very pleased with the dazed look in Wally's eyes.

"Because, I'm your irrationally besotted idiot."


End file.
